Suggested Reading For Significant Others

[beloved]

Pornified: How the Culture of Pornography Is Changing Our Lives, Our Relationships and Our Families by Pamela Paul


From A Press Release
Book Description
In her first book The Starter Marriage and the Future of Matrimony, journalist Pamela Paul opened American’s eyes to a striking trend among couples and introduced the now commonplace phrase. Now she uses her investigative skills to expose yet another social phenomenon – the increasing “pornification” of American society. Over the past decade, technological advances, cultural shifts, and social attitudes have transformed the pornography landscape, and Paul had a suspicion that it was affecting American’s lives more than they knew. Wanting to know more, she commissioned the first nationally representative poll on pornography from Harris Interactive and interviewed more than a hundred individuals, finding that indeed pornography is infiltrating our lives in profound but everyday ways. In PORNIFIED: How Pornography is Transforming Our Lives, Our Relationships, and Our Families, Paul argues that as porn has become more pervasive it is destroying our marriages and families and changing our children’s ideas about sex and sexuality.

The case studies in PORNIFIED and the statistics from the Pornified/Harris Poll are alarming. Men, drawn into harder pornography the longer they use it, eventually lose the ability to relate or be close to women in real life. Women have distorted body images and increasingly feel the need to remodel their appearances – no matter how they personally feel about pornography. Couples describe a breakdown in closeness and a growing absence of trust; in fact, divorces linked to online porn are on the rise. Children, exposed to more pornography than ever before, are more likely to have sex at an earlier age, and even to try to mimic porn. Armed with these new facts, Paul argues that we, individuals and as a society, need to confront the effects of pornography and make efforts to contain the demand for it -- as we would any other public health problem -- before it’s too late.

Paul illustrates how and why all of us – men, women, users, non-users, advocates, and foes – are negatively affected by the sudden ubiquity of pornography. Insightful and shocking, PORNIFIED is an important investigation that will rekindle the debate on how and where pornography meets the public eye.

About the Author:
Pamela Paul is a contributor to Time magazine and the author of The Starter Marriage and the Future of Matrimony. Previously a senior editor at American Demographics and a correspondent for The Economist, she writes for such publications as Psychology Today, Self, Marie Claire, Ladies’ Home Journal, and the New York Times Book Review and is a frequent guest on national broadcast programs.

[beloved]

Porn Generation: How Social Liberalism Is Corrupting Our Future

From A Press Release
Book Description
17-year-olds addicted to hard-core porn, 12-year-olds battling anorexia and 9-year-olds indoctrinated through sex-ed: Are we creating a “Porn Generation?”

Parents do their best to shield their kids from sexually charged music videos, violent rap lyrics, vivid sexual messages, and Internet porn-on-demand. But what do they do when their children learn how to use a condom in third grade? Or are taught that oral sex is “not really sex?” Forget the “me generation” or “Gen X.” Today’s young people are the Porn Generation.

And no one can give you the inside story like twenty-one-year-old Harvard Law student Ben Shapiro. In Porn Generation: How Social Liberalism Is Corrupting Our Future, Shapiro exposes how America’s youth are being corrupted by the “live and let live” culture’s assault on innocence. Already a bestselling author and nationally syndicated columnist, Shapiro reveals how the forces of moral relativism, radical feminism, and generational nihilism have gradually destroyed the foundation of our society’s greatness. Shapiro shows how baby boomers, instead of adopting stronger moral standards, have embraced the lure of personal fulfillment—and how our children are paying the price.

In Porn Generation, Shapiro explores the over-sexualization of our society through entertainment and education. From Abercrombie & Fitch to MTV to middle school sex-education, he peels back the curtain for parents, granting them an inside look into the shocking subculture that their kids must navigate. While America’s entertainment executives continue to look for ways to push the marketing envelope using the most graphic sexual messages, Ben Shapiro provides a wake-up call for parents and equips them with the knowledge they need to fight the moral erosion that is destroying their kids.

In Porn Generation, Shapiro reveals:
Why on college campuses—and throughout the porn generation—sexual relationships are as disposable as used condoms


The real face of taxpayer-funded sex education: nine-year-olds learning about condoms and twelve-year-olds being questioned about their “sexual orientation”


What’s inside the shocking lyrics in top Billboard songs written by today’s young rap “artists”
About The Author:
Ben Shapiro, a Harvard Law student, nationally syndicated columnist, bestselling author—and self-proclaimed virgin—has authored what is sure to become one of the most talked-about books of our time.

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Anna C. Salter
Basic Books
Predators: Pedophiles, Rapists, and Other Sex Offenders: Who They Are, How They Operate, and How We Can Protect Ourselves and Our Children


From Amazon.com
Book Description
A world-renowned expert provides a psychological profile of serial sex offenders--how they think, how they deceive their victims, and how they elude the law.

Psychologist Anna Salter has been studying sexual offenders and their victims for more than twenty years. What she has learned in countless hours of interviews with sexual predators--from respected community leaders to clergymen and trusted family friends--will shock and outrage readers.

What motivates sexual abusers? Why are so few caught? Drawing on the stories of abusers, told in their own words, Salter shows that sexual predators use sophisticated deception techniques and deliberately rely on misconceptions surrounding them to evade discovery. A man who raped more than ninety people tells how he fooled authorities by inserting elements of truth into his story. As recent reports of abuse by priests have shown, abusers often lead double lives in their communities. Two girls repeatedly raped in front of each other told Salter that their assaulter was "still moderator of the town meetings."

Arguing that even the most knowledgeable among us can be fooled, Salter dispels the myths surrounding sexual predators and gives us the tools to protect our families and ourselves.

About the Author
Anna C. Salter, Ph.D., lectures and consults on sex offenders and their victims throughout the U.S. and abroad, and in 1997 won the Significant Achievement Award from the Association for the Treatment of Sexual Abusers. She is the author of Treating Child Sex Offenders and Victims, Transforming Trauma, and several forensic mysteries. She lives in Madison, Wisconsin.

[beloved]

But I Love Him : Protecting Your Teen Daughter from Controlling, Abusive Dating Relationships

Dr. Jill Murray
Regan Books

One in three girls will be in a controlling, abusive dating relationship before she graduates from high school--from verbal or emotional abuse to sexual abuse or physical battering. Is your daughter in danger?

Dr. Jill Murray speaks on the topic of dating violence at high schools around the country, reaching more than 10,000 students, teachers, and counselors each year. In every school she visits, she is approached by teenage girls in miserable relationships who, when confronted with the option of breaking up with the boy, exclaim, "But I love him!"

Many young women--and their parents--aren't even aware of the indications of a potentially abusive relationship. What's most alarming is that these warning signs are also some of the behaviors that girls find most flattering:

A boy pages and calls a girl often--but as a form of control, not affection.

He wants to spend all his time with her, but eventually won't allow her to spend time with her friends.

He says "I love you" very early in the relationship.

These behaviors can escalate into blaming, isolating, manipulating, threatening, humiliation, and sexual and physical abuse.

In But I Love Him, Dr. Murray identifies these controlling, abusive patterns of behavior and helps you get your daughter out of the relationship without alienating her. You will learn what draws her to this type of relationship, why she has a hard time talking to you about it, the special barriers teens face when breaking off a relationship, and what's going on in the mind of a teen abuser. Dr. Murray will help you show your teen what a respectful relationship looks like--and teach her the importance of respecting herself.

Is Your Teen Daughter in a Controlling, Abusive Relationship?

Abuse can take many forms, from verbal and emotional abuse to sexual abuse and battering. Many signs of abuse are subtle and can be warnings of danger ahead. How many of the following statements apply to your daughter?


Before my daughter met her boyfriend, she had more friends than she does now.
Her grades have declined in recent weeks or months.
She used to be more outgoing and involved with her family, school activities, and/or place of worship.
She frequently cries or is very sad.
If he pages her, she must call him back immediately.
He told her that he loved her early in their relationship.
He is jealous if she looks at or speaks casually with another boy.
He accuses her of doing things she hasn't actually done.
He is aggressive in other areas of his life: he puts his fist through walls or closets, bangs his fist to make a point, or throws objects when angry.
He frequently roughhouses or play-wrestles with her.
She makes excuses for his poor behavior or says it's her fault.
They talk on the phone several times each day or for long periods at a time.
He has a "tragic" home life: he is or was physically abused or verbally demeaned, and/or one or both parents are alcoholics or use drugs.
He drinks or uses drugs.
He frequently gives her "advice" about her choice of friends, hairstyle, clothes, or makeup.
He calls her demeaning names, then laughs and tells her he was only kidding.
She has become secretive since she started dating him.
She is miserable whenever she is apart from him.
She has become very critical of her own appearance, talents, or abilities.
She frequently has to explain herself to her boyfriend or often says she's sorry.
She has bruises she cannot explain or appears nervous about explaining to me.
Read But I Love Him to find out more.

[beloved]

The New Thought Police: Inside the Left's Assault on Free Speech and Free Minds

Tammy Bruce, Laura Schlessinger (Forward)
Prima Publishing

Editorial Reviews from Amazon.com

Book Description
Stop the Left from Policing Your Mind
Our freedom to speak our minds is under attack. Like the Thought Police of George Orwell's 1984, powerful special interest groups on the Left are mounting a withering assault on our rights in the name of "social equality." Liberty has been turned on its ear as the rights of the few restrict the freedom of everyone. In The New Thought Police, author Tammy Bruce, a self-described lesbian feminist activist, cuts through the deluge of politically correct speech and thought codes to expose the dangerous rise of Left-wing McCarthyism. Provocative and persuasive, this book is a clarion call to anyone interested in preserving liberty.

About the Author
Tammy Bruce has appeared on The O'Reilly Factor, Hannity & Colmes, Today, The G. Gordon Liddy Show, and The Larry Elder Show, among numerous other television and radio programs, and she has been written about in the Los Angeles Times, New York Times, U.S. News & World Report, Human Events, and elsewhere. A regular columnist for NewsMax.com and FrontPageMagazine.com and a frequent writer for The Advocate, she lives in Los Angeles.

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You might be wondering why I would put this in suggested reading for you. It's because many times women (especially in the church) are taught to not think for themselves. Society, the church, and abusive husbands are telling us to shut up and let them think for us.

Please think for yourself. Please read the bible for yourself. And please stand up for what is right even if it isn't politically correct.

[beloved]

10 Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives by Dr. Laura Schlessinger

1. Stupid Attachment
Looking to the context of a man to find and define yourself.

2. Stupid Courtship
Becomming a beggar, not a chooser, in the dating ritual becasue you are desperate to have a man

3. Stupid Devotion
Finding Yourself driven to love, and suffer, and succor (or is that sucker?) in vain

4. Stupid Passion
Having sex too soon, too romantically, setting yourself up to be burned.

5. Stupid Cohabitation
Lying to yourself and living with him because you hope he'll want you

6. Stupid Expectations
Using marriage as a quick fix for low or no self esteem.

7. Stupid Conception
Using biology misguidedly as a jump-start for love, personal growth, and commitment.

8. Stupid Subjugation
Allowing you and your children to be held hostage by your own obsessive need for security and attachment

9. Stupid Helplessness
Being too scared and insecure to deal with your rage and turning it inot wimpyness instead

10. Stupid Forgiving
Not knowing when to break off a no-win relationship, or how not to get involved in the first place.